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Category: Life

Beauty Life Pooping

Shit Doesn’t Always Happen

My Mormon cousin Jill is now selling colon cleanses and wanted me to try one.  Jill has 5 kids and is totally sexy so my curiosity peaked.  I asked her if it would turn me Mormon.  She said no and because my week was already shit, I decided to go…

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Family Life My Mom Pets

Big Pimpin’ Spendin’ Mike’s G’s

Last week my yorkie Layla, became ill after eating rabbit shit according to our vet.  This incidentally serves as a good reminder for all of us: Stop Doing That.  My precious baby required a variety of antibiotics, x-rays, blood work, an IV, hand fed meals, massages and a couple thousand…

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Family Life Pets

Lucky Nipples

I was driving along a busy road to pick my daughters up from school, when I saw a dog playing frogger in traffic.  Now, if there is anything I have a weakness for, it is Italian men and dogs (particularly of the jacked up puppy mill variety). I just knew…

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A couple months ago, my 4 year old and I went up to the store to get some crayons.   When we came out, a woman was standing by my car with her hand on her hip and a surly expression on her face.  She pointed to my car and…

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Childhood Life Parents

The Mystery Animal

Every summer growing up, my father would load up the Ford Windstar mini-van and take my 3 siblings and me to southern California to see our grandparents.  My ultra-conservative, Christian grandparents lived in a gated old person’s neighborhood where there were approximately a gazillion rules.  They took special care to…

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